I'm Feeling Lucky Today!!

(Mom, don't start signing. Oh never mind, go ahead!)

When ever I think about buying a house (this happens often) and I start looking around and I discover that there is nothing affordable where I want to live (this happens just as often) I buy a lottery ticket. I figure that is going to be the only way I'll ever afford to buy in California. I usually buy from the same liquor store. The dogs and I take a walk and they wait outside (not tied up but on a nice solid down-stay) while I go inside. Then a few days later we'll walk back and we repeat the process, this time with me using the handy, "Did you win?" machine to see if I've won. Sadly, it always tells me, "Sorry, not a winner."

The machine is right next to the clerk. It is almost always the same guy and he makes a comment about how I did not win. It makes me feel, like, well, a looser. It also makes me feel foolish. It makes me feel as if it is ok to buy a lottery ticket, expecting to win (because if you really, truly expected to loose you wouldn't waste your money) but if you have the nerve to check that ticket, you must be delusional because everyone knows that you won't REALLY win.

After I'm told I'm a looser I don't know what to do with the ticket. Should I rip it up and throw it on the ground like my esteemed mother taught me to do at the horse races? The clerk might now like that. Should I meekly put it in the garbage can? Should I burn it while muttering spells over it to help me win next time? Maybe I should feed it to my dog?

I tried that once. But the clerk came to stand outside for some fresh air and caught me playing tug-o-war with my rather large dog and a tiny piece of paper and probably thought up some extra adjectives in addition to looser. When I saw him watching I meekly threw what was left of the ticket away and made my escape. Maybe I'll try the voodoo burning next time.

So if the clerk keeps calling me a looser (or is it the machine?) why do I feel lucky? Well, I couldn't take being a looser at the same store and I just hadn't made it back to check my ticket anyways. It had been a few weeks so when I stopped for a refreshing fountain beverage (it turned out to be a little tasteless) at a gas station I hadn't been to before, I checked my ticket there. I was a $1 winner!!!!!! I applied it to a new ticket. The drawing is on Wednesday, so if I win, I will share the winnings with anyone in my family who has a birthday on that day.

Winning one dollar was much luckier than the lady who was running around moaning that she had lost her keys. She was digging through a display full of ice and sodas because she thought they might have fallen in there because she put her hand in there. Hmmm... Did she put her hand with her keys in there? Or just her hand? She didn't know and I didn't either. I offered her a phone but she declined so I left. Not much I could do to help her.

In addition to winning one dollar, and not loosing my keys in tub of ice at a random gas station, I also feel lucky today because one of my co-workers returned from a week long TDY to state headquarters with the welcome news that our jobs are secure! We are not going to be fired, laid off, let go, given the boot, cast off or culled out in any way. This week. Or next week. As far as state HQ is concerned the State Active Duty program is not changing in the foreseeable future.

With that welcome news, maybe I'll go back to house hunting. I'd better buy a lotto ticket.